some funny lines

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
'Hold my purse.'

Men are like bank accounts.
Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.

Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.